Why The "Love Your Body" Movement Is Wrong

Telling yourself you love your body is great, but it’s not going to work.

THE PROBLEM

The problem with the “Love Your Body” movement and the fact that we need a movement in the first place, is WOMEN ARE STILL PUTTING THEIR SELF-WORTH ON HOW THEIR BODIES LOOK.

WHY IT’S NOT GOING TO WORK

Telling yourself you love your body, when you don’t believe it, is a Band-Aid.

It’s not getting to the deeper issue-where you’re placing your self-worth. You can’t change how you feel about yourself by putting a Band-Aid on it, reciting it, and praying it becomes true.

It’s like telling yourself, “I don’t like ice cream” to ensure you won’t eat it.

How long will that last?

For a long time I believed this. I wanted sooooo badly for it to be this easy. But it’s a deeper issue that requires deeper digging and thought.

WHAT ARE WE REALLY TRYING TO DO?

This movement’s objective is for women to be happy in their own skin. Which is awesome. Anything that makes women even a little happier is great. And at least we are bringing awareness to this BIG issue.

BUT!!! You could be so much happier if it was REAL and wasn’t done with a Band-Aid. 

So, how do you do it?

THE FIX

SOUL WORK

Take Your Main Focus Off Your Body

The key to being happy in your own skin is to take your main focus off your body.

This doesn’t mean don’t care about how it looks or that you can’t continue to work on your appearance (we will get to this later.) You just don’t want to be putting your self-worth on it.

If you go up a pant size, you shouldn’t feel less worthy as a person. You may not be happy about it, and it may not be what you consider ideal, but it shouldn’t be ruining your life either.

Figure out Your Purpose

So, where do you put your focus?

On figuring out where your worth as a person, as a human being, comes from. Why are you here? What is your purpose in life?

I can assure you, you’re not here to agonize over your body.

You're here for a reason-to help humanity in your own unique way. And when you figure that out, it will light a fire inside of you, and you will realize WORRYING about your body is a complete waste of your precious time.

I PROMISE YOU THIS.

Our superficial society gets in the way of this thinking. It profits from you thinking less of yourself and comparing yourself to other women. When you feel insecure, you buy the products they are selling.

MENTAL WORK

Practice Dealing with Shameful Thoughts and Comments Constructively

Start paying closer attention to that voice in your head that tells you, you aren’t good enough. Don’t listen to it, but pay attention to it so you can deal with it constructively vs. letting it tear you down.  

Remember You Are Not the Only One

Part of dealing with these voices is to remember, you are not the only one who feels this way. You’re not some lonely freak of a women who hates her body.

Remember It’s All Just a Bunch of Made Up Crap

Your feelings and voices of inadequacy are based a bunch of made up crap.

Our culture has you programmed to think that women should look a certain way to be worthy. The beauty/weight loss/fitness industry creates these messages to get you to buy their products. And in the process, have also created a brainwashed culture.

This is why finally loving yourself requires you to step away from the crowd. You have to be willing to think differently than the majority of our culture.

You ARE worthy no matter what the media is trying to sell.

PHYSICAL WORK

Take Care of Your Body Physically

Let’s be real here. Part of feeling good in your own skin comes from becoming fit and taking care of your body physically. Physically caring for, and respecting your body is part of developing a better relationship with yourself as a person.

There is also nothing wrong with wanting to improve your appearance, because it’s important. But, the problem comes from thinking that fit can only look a certain way and then start attaching your self-worth to this imaginary image. This becomes a dangerous rabbit hole (which we will get into in a minute.)

When you take care of yourself physically, do the mental work, and soul work, over time things fall into place.

___________________

Sounds like a lot of work RIGHT?!

Well, going through life not happy with who you are is A LOT more work.

And a lot more painful.

WHY JUST GETTING FITTER ISN’T THE ANSWER (AND MANY TIMES MAKES IT WORSE)

The Fitness and Body Obsession Rabbit Hole

When your self-worth is tied to how you look, fitness can become a dangerous rabbit hole.

When this is the case, enough is NEVER enough.

You can never be lean enough, defined enough, or pretty enough.

There are many women who have what our society calls a “perfect body” and they still hate themselves-because their self-worth is completely tied to how they look.

I used to be on this pursuit of “perfection” wheel. It’s a ride I never want to take again. It’s a never-ending hamster wheel of pain.

WRAP UP

To be happy in your own skin you need to:

  • Take your main focus off your body
  • Figure out your purpose and live from this place (what really matters in your life)
  • Practice dealing with negative thoughts from yourself and others
  • Remember, you are not the only one who feels this way
  • Remind yourself that it’s all a bunch of made up crap
  • Take care of yourself physically

 

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Think fresh and live your fullest and happiest life,

~Ashley~

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